The Play - Written by Eric Shaw and Faith Swords in 2003ish

part one - (a brief introduction to the ending)

he: i did not know how to compare beauty to beauty, so i kept my lips shut
he: it was what you wanted to hear, i couldn't help but say it
she: you could say whatever you needed to say
he: i felt hopeless, it had been so long, i didn't even look at the phone
she: i am sorry i wasnt there for you

part two - (wires in our hearts)

she: he was my god, my idol, the one i would have married if he'd let me
she: and then one day, he just left
she: i keep telling myself it would have been easier if he died
she: then at least i would have understood his leaving and not saying why
he: she said she loved me
he: and i told her i didn't love her
he: and she said that was fine
he: and i said okay, i didnt even care enough to change the subject
(her body made her a movie star)
she: worlds collided when she walked in a room
he: everyone kept talking about it for days
she: weeks even
he: i didn't say a word
she: you didn't have to
he: i knew exactly what you were thinking
she: you always know somehow, even when i don't talk about it

part three - (we can't talk about it anymore)

he: i knew you were gone for good
she: i hadn't even left at that point
he: i dont care
she: it didn't matter, but it did
he: it always mattered
she: unless you were lying all those times
he: would you really care anyways?

part three point five - (everyone makes messes)
he: i started drinking again
he: this time with my mother
he: but we didn't talk about it
she: your mother always hated me
he: she smiled, and i smiled and cried
she: she thought i was too old and too pale and too ambitious for you
he: you reminded her too much of things
he: the things even she couldn 't talk or think about it
he: the things the drugs were supposed to fix
she: she once told me "you remind me of me"
he: no you thought she did
he: she said it with her body
he: it would have hurt too much to say that
she: she said it
she: but didn't remember or tell anyone
she: and i never spoke of it until now
he: i dont believe you

part four - (bitter secrets told across bitter lips)

he: i was always mad at you
she: you werent mad at me you were mad about me
she: i didn't do anything then, except sit in the window and smoked the last of your cigarettes
he: i didn't like the ones who thought they understood you, or anything
he: everyone made me upset
he: minus the bus drivers that brought me to you
she: i always told you bus drivers are the best people
she: she hated when i took you away
she: when you followed my lead a little too well
she: she wouldn't even drive by our house
he: she was jealous like me, or i was jealous like her, we were always jealous
she: always quiet though
she: i never knew
he: i didn't want to tell you
he: half the time it was over you
he: i didn't even want to tell myself
he: but i had to
she: you waited too long to tell anyone anything
she: you always did
she: that was the biggest problem
she: that was when i started to get scared
she: and spent a lot of nights driving
she: thinking
he: i tried to tell you everything that night
he: i always tried to tell everyone everything
he: it always came out wrong
he: it came out right when i was driving home alone
he: you couldn't hear then
he: i didn't bother calling
she: i told you it wouldnt hurt to call

part five - (sleep schedules)

she: i waited up all night
she: i got drunk
she: i hadn't gotten that drunk in a long time
she: even now i don't know where you went that night
she: just that you never came home
he: dont fucking mention it, you know i wont talk about it
(everything had changed even us, but we didnt realize it)
he: she just called
he: i wasn't expecting it
he: i couldn't find the words like i could with you
he: i stumbled
he: i was nervous
he: i wonder if she could tell
he: i just told her to buy the book
she: you fell in love with her in a way you never loved me
he: i loved watching her 
he: i loved being with you
she: her love or my love, her sex,or my passion?
she: which fucking was it, back then?
he: i was drunk
he: i couldn't tell
he: i felt guilty
he: i didn't know what to say
she: i felt ashamed
she: i knew exactly what to say
she: but i didn't say it

part 5 and one half - (all the way and then, a little more)

she: i just started packing
he: we were in the parking lot
he: i liked the little rocks and the ashphalt
he: you hated it
she: they tore up my stockings
she: showed the scars
she: but you liked that
he: i suddenly felt upset nauseous i didn't want her to call
he: it just confused things
she: she and i were at the opposite ends of you
he: i liked her too much
he: and i didn't like her enough
she: you loved everything except me
he: i hated everything that kept me from you
she: you tried to understand how important it was
she: but the film was bad, it didn't take 
she: just cloudy grey
he: i was young, i didn't know better
she: you only thought that
she: all along, you knew
he: you would always sing me to sleep
she: lullabies
he: i was starting to doubt my senses
he: everything was blurry and distorted
he: even you
she: we were both hallucinations
he: maybe i wasnt ready to see or hear you
she: i thought i'd made you up
she: you were an angel back then
he: i was a better person back then, i cried more, but i was better
she: i smoked too many cigarettes
she: you remember, you liked the ashes
he: i am worse now,we are worse now, and i still dont know about you
she: we are the same people we always were

part six - (physical relationships)

he: we gave up the physical things
she: you wouldn't touch me anymore
she: i hid my hands behind my back
he: i felt guilty
he: you knew my body too well
he: it was embarassing
he: because it wasn't my body it was his body
he: you were always trying to touch little pieces of him when you touched me
she: once, i thought it might have been him
she: he didn't die, but it felt that way sometimes
she: it wasn't helping me, it was just saving you
she: i had to leave
she: i only took what i needed
she: i left your things where they were
he: it was all true, she really did call, i have the pictures to prove it all
he: i always kept the pictures
he: i couldnt let them go
he: she looked too good
she: you could never let anynthing go
she: i hated her photographs more than i hated her
he: i hated her too
he: but i couldnt give it up, she mad love like a miracle
he: i couldn't let her go
she: you left me no choice
she: you made me what i was

part seven - (the island moves)

he: you were always changing
he: i didn't know which you i liked
he: it made things hard and confusing
she: i chose you
he: & i chose “you”
he: i was sick, hungover, i didn't know what to do
she: he was already two years gone by then
she: there wasn't even a choice
he: you always had a choice
she: a choice required more than one option
she: it was always about you
he: you always had options, dont lie we’re too good at that
she: it was never even about me
he: i was begining to find out who i was, but i didn't like what was in the mirror, it was the same as before, and the same as always
he: it is all about you
he: in reality it was physical
he: even when i was talking to you on the phone i looked at that picture
he: i needed the touches
he: your hands were my hands
she: you were my eyes
he: and i was drinking too much again, i was getting ready to leave
he: you couldn't stop me this time
she: when it began
she: you would never have left me
she: i would have been the thing that stopped you

part eight - (calendar counting and pillowtalk)

he: i told you i was young
he: i was too young
he: i knew too much
he: but i was still too young
she: i'm going to have to leave soon
he: you always have to leave soon, it makes me mad
(you always had to leave soon)
he: it started like everything else with you
he: i was excited, so excited,inspired everything the drugs did you did
he: then worldly things got in the way
he: time
she: people and friends
she: faces and lies
she: gossip, and drugs
he: you were bored with me
he: and i was bored with me
she: i wasn't bored
she: that was you
she: i cared more than you knew
she: but didn't know what to say
he: you always knew what to do
she: not with you
she: you saw through it
she: you always saw through it
she: this is a play
she: this is where we stand in front of god
he: i was the only one who did, and it was a curse
he: it hurt more than it helped
she: it was like swallowing fire every time i turned my head
she: you were always looking
she: the walls didn't get in the way 
she: you saw through everything
she: i felt so guilty
he: and more and more i didn't care
he: i flushed the drugs down the toilet
he: 2 days later i found a buyer
he: i still didn't care that much
she: you never did
she: you never cared about those things
she: we were better than the common junkies
she: we were smarter
she: and talented
he: but we were so much worse, we knew what we were doing 
she: it was art, not addiction
he: we used that excuse one too many times
he: the rains came and there were floods
she: it worked for a long time though
he: it did, but it wasn't art anymore
he: we realized that
she: it was always art, even when it was other things
he: it isnt't anymore, dont lie now it’s childish
she: you used to beleive me
he: you are the best liar i’ve ever met you even fooled me& i was your king
she: i would never lie to you 

part nine - (the last elegant you)

she: once you told me that we'd never die
she: that we'd live forever 
she: i wasn't sure whether you meant in heaven or in hell
she: or here
he: i wasn't sure either
he: we were too human
he: i hated it
he: more than anything else
he: i hated being part of all the emotions
he: i wanted to get away from it all
she: &so we made ourselves into gods
she: and hated each other when we were wrong
he: you were a god to me
he: but i still couldnt get away from the pain
she: once a long time ago i was helen of troy to you
she: but i was just a pawn
she: sometimes i felt like i was being tested
she: sometimes like i was being used
she: you never cared about that part
she: that is why i loved you
he: it was part of the game
he: i had to play you right
he: i knew it wouldn't be easy
he: it was hard on both of us
he: but we loved the risks
she: you lost
she: check and mate
he: i did not lose completely
he: it wasnt about winning or losing
she: yes it was
she: even now you won't admit it
she: look we have nothing left to lose
she: don't you understand that?
she: we're stuck to each other
she: no more love, just lies
she: just faking forever
he: we lost together
he: when i lost you lost
she: but i never played
she: i was the vessel
he: you did
he: you loved the games
he: you wouldn't have had it any other way
she: i would have chosen another path
she: if there had been one
she: it was a lack of options
she: not an excess of them
he: you know it was the only way
she: i tried to tell you i never had a choice
he: you had to have the risks, it ruined me, i hated playing you
he: we didn't want the simple life
she: it wasn't us

part ten

she: sometimes i wished i was someone else
she: that i could have a normal life
she: and fall in love with the right man
she: have straight hair
he: you wished I were someone else
he: i was behind you when you shut your eyes in front of the mirror
she: it was so easy to just reach out and smash
she: i thought it would help
he: we lied and thought a lot of things would help
she: you bandaged my bleeding hands
she: so tender but so far away
he: even though i hated the blood
she: your hands were shaking
he: they hid the tears
she: i regretted too many things
she: you always tried to live without admitting the regret
he: i just didn't care
he: i was worried about now
he: now was never ago
he: now was never okay
she: and never again

part eleven - (who could be at the door?)

he: i am still sad
she: in your head it's worse
he: the great sadness, the great joy, and you
he: awlays in my head
she: in our head
she: we were too much of the same person
she: in too many bodies
he: the pain was fine, the sadness after the joy wasn't, and im still not sure about you
she: the things that mattered the most at the beginning were the things that destroyed us in the end